Have I Become a Blahgger?

I hit the ground running. Ah, a blog! A way to express myself and share a little bit of me with all of you. (Annie ... no comments about "yeah, both of us.")

I was firing off posts left and right ... leaving comments on blogs of my friends and their friends' blogs. I was excited to be in the blogosphere! Some of you even linked to my blog, and I wept. Course, I had to hint and beg, but you came through. The rest of you should follow suit.

And then it hit ... just as suddenly as it took off. It was like a train wreck.

I got blogstipated.

And don't pretend you don't know what that is. You log into your blog and you end up sitting there, trying your little heart out to produce something. You may even turn red in the face and break out in a sweat, straining for something. Anything! But nothing. The brain gets all stopped up. You're stuck ... bloated with emptiness ... wondering if you should investigate a blenema. I had to do more research before taking such a drastic step.

So I whipped out the trusty Wikipedia to see if I could determine exactly what condition I had ... to explain to me how it happened and what I should do about it.

Did I need to join B.A.? No, no, no ... this was the absense of the addiction. I was simply stuck. Certainly I could get things going without 10 steps.

But I had stalled after 10 random things. What was happening to me???

Was it blogtle dysfunction? Had the honeymoon worn off? Were mental issues affecting my performance? I mean ... I hadn't lost interest in blogging. To the contrary ... I was still infatuated with the ability to talk/type for an hour or so without interruption. But when it came time to do the deed, I was coming up short. Yes, it was sounding more like BD with every Google second going by. I even think I saw a commercial for this debilitating condition on The WB. Had I truly lost my li-bt-lo? (Log in, blog to, log out.) I'm only 40 ... it couldn't be.

But more alarming was the discovery of an entire plethora of conditions that I could face while in this wonderful world of Web 2.0. I pressed on.

Had I suffered from blogorrhea when I first joined in? I mean ... I wasn't incessantly blogging hour after hour, but I was doing it at least once a day. Sounds fairly regular to me ... no Pepto for me. I'd pass, thank you. Nasty stuff.

Many of you have come out of being blistless for a while ... a sense of apathy or disinterest with the whole thing. I'm glad to see you back. Perhaps knowing I wasn't alone would help.

I can assure you this much ... what you are reading is not a flog. It's all me, 100%. Fresh from the medulla oblongata, or somewhere near there I think.

Perhaps it's just a time issue ... not enough time when I'm sitting at the computer. Perhaps I should try moblogging from my cell phone? Short, sweet nothings to the blogdience? I know, I know ... you'd want more. And I can't do 80 words per minute on a ten-key.

But here I sit ... realizing my problems are finally over. I've emerged once again ... active and alive. I can go ride a horse or swim or do whatever I want, feeling fresh and renewed. I'm back in the blogging saddle, revived from reading all of your blogs ... finding my blog in your links ... laughing and singing and dancing. I can now stand up and move on with my life.

Yep ... all it took was a little blaxitive. Thanks folks ... you are all wonderful people.