I Need Your Help, Please!

Dear family, friends, bloggers, and strangers alike …

Happy Holidays to every one of you! You may be reading this message through Facebook and/or through my blog … if you encounter it twice, consider it a bonus!

Strengths and weaknesses … we all have them. I can identify two weaknesses for me when I was growing up:

1. I was not a salesman. Candles, candy, cookies, sunglasses, more candles, atlases … no matter what the fundraiser was, I stunk at it. If I didn’t want to buy it, why would someone else? Door-to-door was the worst. (Thanks to all my extended family and neighbors who were nice enough to not to crush my spirit and ended up purchasing “stuff.”)

2. I was not one to ask people for help. Potential conflict or rejection was not something I looked for, so I was not one to impose or interrupt someone for help unless it was pretty urgent. I found it easier to try and do what I could on my own. (Note to self: bad idea.)

Well, fortunately, I’ve somewhat grown out of these weaknesses, as I’m about to tackle both of them with this message.

In a nutshell, I need your help to do something very special this holiday season. The ask? Prayer. And a donation.

(There … that wasn’t so bad for me. You still with me? Good.) And now … the rest of the story. Please read all of it … it will truly give you reason to be thankful this season.

Three years ago this past August, Hurricane Katrina took a direct path over the coastal town of Bay St. Louis, Mississippi. It was one of the deadliest and most costly hurricanes to hit the United States. Over 90% of structures up to a half a mile inland were severely damaged or totally destroyed. Winds were sustained at 120 mph, and the storm surge of 27 feet pushed inland up to 12 miles. In Mississippi alone, 238 were dead, 67 missing and damage totaled billions of dollars.

So you would think after three years, things would be better. The current facts are unfortunately very sombering.

• Nearly 300 families in Mississippi are being returned to hotels from mobile homes as FEMA moves to close the last of its emergency housing sites in the state.
  
• FEMA has announced a March 1 cutoff date for all temporary housing payments.


• Across the Gulf Coast, there are still at least 9,300 families in trailers and 1,600 in hotel rooms.
  
• About 3,200 FEMA travel trailers and mobile homes remain in use in Mississippi.
  
• Hundreds of federally-issued trailers and mobile homes have been identified as having high levels of toxins, including formaldehyde.
  
• There are an estimated 30,000 children living in trailers and temporary housing in the region. A Children's Health Fund study released this month reveals that the “Katrina children” are the sickest children in the U.S., with iron-deficiency anemia, upper respiratory infections, skin ailments, and behavior or learning problems.
  
• Many of these kids are going to spend their FOURTH Christmas in a place that is not their home.
  

So … how can you help?

On December 10th, I’ll be leaving with a team from Wildwood Baptist Church on a “rebuild three-day” to continue ongoing work to get people back in their homes for the holidays. The DiRT Ministry takes these trips a number of times a year, and the need for assistance is overwhelming.

But not insurmountable with your help!

Priority Ask #1 … PRAY. Pray for these victims of this natural disaster, that they don’t feel forgotten. Pray for our team as we minister to their physical and spiritual needs. If you’re not one to pray … give it a shot. While I am excited about the prospects of this trip, my heart grows heavier as I read more about the situation and consider the plight of the families still trying to put their lives back together after three long years. When I imagine what Thanksgiving and Christmas must be like for these children, my throat closes up, I have a hard time focusing on what I’m doing, and I wrestle with myself as to why I haven’t done something sooner.

Priority Ask #2 … DONATE. Please consider a donation to the DiRT Ministry to help offset the costs for travel and supplies for this trip, to cover past expenses from recent trips, and to establish a legacy for trips in the future. We all understand how much tighter the times are with the economy as it is, but think about how much more troubling it is for those who are already desperate for help. Perhaps you can bypass that cup of Starbucks. Or a fast-food meal. Maybe you save so much during Black Friday that you can give just a little back. This is one of those moments in time where an army of friends giving a little from the individual perspective will result in a fantastic outcome.

Giving is easy … play “DiRTopoly!” This online gameboard has streets listed where DiRT has served families in the past 18 months, or various other Bay St. Louis streets, landmarks or utilities. Go to http://www.w2ps.com/dirt/board.htm and roll your mouse over the various properties to see their value. Then click on the property to purchase it … which will be your tax-deductible donation of that amount to the DiRT Ministry. If you prefer, you can select Chance or Community Chest and designate a specific amount to give.

The link above is directly to the board, and it is also accessible from the http://www.dirtministry.com/ website, where you can see photos and videos about this ministry. You can use a credit card to make these donations, or a registered PayPal account. And if you wish to specifically direct your donation to scholarships (for travel expenses), tooling or materials, there is a field to make that known to the DiRT Coordinator.

Make a gift in someone’s honor … what a cool Christmas gift THAT can be! (On a side note, visit http://www.adventconspiracy.org/ for one of THE coolest videos I’ve seen this season. But not until you’ve made your donation to DiRT!)

If you prefer to make a donation by check, make it out to Wildwood Baptist Church and mail it to them at 4801 Wade Green Road, Acworth, GA 30102 and put “Mississippi Missions Fund” in the memo line. Or you can give it to me and I’ll get it to them. Please do not write my name on the check, but if you donate via this route and you mail it, please let me know via a blog comment or Facebook or email so I can thank you! At the very least, please let me know that you’ll consider praying for us December 10th through the 13th. Or more!

Still here? Wow, thanks … we made it together! Sorry if it got long … but there was plenty to tell and I didn’t want to leave out anything. Again, I hope that you and your family and friends experience all the blessings of the upcoming holiday season, and here’s to a very prosperous and healthy 2009! Thank you for your considerations of this effort.

All the best,
Chip

Fifteenth Bank?

OK ... we were driving home from a wedding in Toccoa (second weekend wedding in a row for us, with both young children as the flower girl and ring "bear," and the eldest child as a bridesmaid in today's wedding.) But I digress from the topic at hand.

There was a billboard in Gwinnett County on I-85 that left me in a more discombobulated state than I already was. It was an advertisement for a bank. Now we all have heard of banks like "First National Bank" or "First State Bank," much like we hear of First Baptist Church or even Second Baptist Church (did they lose a race or something?)

But this bank ... it's way down the line in the standings. Fifth Third Bank.

What what?

I blinked and rubbed my eyes to be sure I was reading it right. Yep, Fifth Third Bank.

Are they serious?

Well, it demanded some research. There had to be a logical reason to make your bank sound like an odd fraction or a cryptic rendition of "Fifteenth Bank."

Let's start at their website ... http://www.53.com ... I'll give them credit. That's easy to remember. OK, let's find their history under About Us. Goes back to 1858 as Bank of the Ohio Valley. Nothing weird about that. Then Third National picked it up in 1871. And in the turn of the century, the Thirds wanted to fraternize with the Fifths, and so they did. (The Fifths never forgave the Thirds for cutting in line at the bank charter store.)

Anyhoo ... fancy the thought that on this weekend wedding, I'd encounter a bank with a funny name that was the product of a wedding of their own. Fifth National and Third National (kissing cousins?) became Fifth Third.

And the rest is history. I think I still prefer my bank, which was a merger of Sun Bank and Trust Company (yes, you know who). It's much easier to say. You try to say Fifth Third three times fast and see what you come up with. Don't blend those "TH"s ... enunciate, enunciate, enunciate. Fifthird is not what we're talking here. They've worked hard for that name.

Can a zoo be sexy?

Just when you think you've seen it all ... something trumps it.

I was driving down (or up, depending on your orientation) Barrett Parkway the other day and was passed by a van or truck sporting an advertisement for the Atlanta Zoo.

This particular ad was sensationalizing the most unique and/or bizarre animal that you would ever see. (And strangely enough, an image of it was on the ad itself, making it somewhat anti-climatic in that you could see it vs. having to drive downtown to the zoo to catch a glimpse.)

The animal? NAKED MOLE RAT

Now ... here's where I started scratching my head and thinking that a blog entry was on it's way. I have two points.

1. The marketing firm for the Zoo really didn't have to use the word "naked" in this ad, now did they? So why? Because ... it gets your attention. I mean ... think about it. If you thought you could get a glimpse at a mole rat, you'd probably yawn and consider trimming your toenails as more exciting. But a NAKED mole rat? Well, that's a different story. Get's all sorts of thoughts going, probably more so for the guys than the girls. Wiring, it is. But even so, the second point also deserves your scrutiny ...
   
   
2. Aren't all animals naked? Do you really see animals in the zoo clothed? Sheesh ... they wouldn't look very natural in a frock or pantaloons, now would they? So basically ... when you visit the zoo, aren't you seeing a NAKED elephant, a NAKED zebra, a NAKED snake, and those delightful NAKED pink flamingos? Why, if the marketing folks could get that wrapped up on the back of a vehicle, ticket sales would jump through the roof. Even by folks who have been to the zoo and know good and well that they aren't going to see anything different!! Am I right?? Then the zoo could work out a deal with The Varsity to sell Naked Dogs, right there on the spot. (Now that's a draw.)
   

But let me clear ... that naked mole rat was an ugly little guy. Kinda like Perry the Platypus from Phineas and Ferb. (Sorry ... Disney Channel lingity there ...) Not a pretty sight. Hairless and buckteeth.

I'd pay more to see him in a pinstripe suit, frankly. 'Cuz I've already seen the dude NAKED rolling down Barrett Parkway. Helloooo marketing people ... leave something to the imagination next time, OK? Geezes.

And a sidenote regarding The Varsity ... when I was in college at UGA, I was driving through at the greasy V there in Athens. At the board, you were supposed to order using their terms. I wanted a hot dog with ketchup and an orange drink. So what did I have to proclaim as my culinary desire that steamy Georgia afternoon?

"I need a red dog and a big squirt."

Felt a little dirty as I heard it repeated back to me. But it ate well.

Nope, nothing quirky to see here

AJ Macc tells me that I'm a blogger that she reads. Bless her soul.

And in one of her last blogs, she tagged me for six quirky things. Do I look like someone who would have even one or two quirks?

Don't answer that. Allow me to self-quirk myself. Here we go.

1. I have recently discovered a quirk that apparently I share with my mother (genetic, me thinks.) One of the most comfortable spots is to be laying/lying on the sofa with my right foot wedged in between the cushion and the back of the sofa. No, I can't tell you why. I wasn't tagged to explain my quirks. Just list them.
   
   
2. I cannot sit in a room with a crooked picture. My insides sit there shouting, "People! Can't you see that??? Dear God, will someone tip that frame just a little to the left so we can continue our conversation??? Aggghhhh!" Depending on the event and how well I know the host or hostess, I have been known to apologize politely and step over to straighten it, or just wait until they are gone and get it in order. They can thank me later. And I have been thanked by other members in the room who were having silent shouting matches with their insides as well.
   
   
3. I've been told that I have perfect pitch. I don't know how quirky that is, but it has come in handy in years past. In order to hear a pitch, I demand silence, or I have to step away so I can hear it in my mind. OK, so that may be more freaky than quirky ... I can literally "hear" stuff in my mind. It used to drive my friends crazy. They would start singing a song, but they would be like three or four keys off. I'd say, "No, that's not it. Listen." And I would start singing it as if it were on the radio. And then I'd be called a name. And the singing would stop.
   
   
4. If I had my way (and perhaps I will someday), there would not be any dry goods packaging in our pantry. All those jumbled boxes and sizes, usually taking up more space than the product inside! Everything would be in something like Tupperware. Perhaps labeled. And maybe alphabetized. And all the spices would be in the same type of shaker. And they would definitely be alphabetized.
   
   
5. I love to cook when I'm on vacation. I look for condos or houses with a kitchen, and I love to hit the grocery stores and buy up stuff to get set up and fix meals for our family. When I was younger, I wanted to be a travel agent, so I love finding places to go and planning trips.
   
   
6. I call Veda every single day before I leave work to let her know I'm on the way, and to see if she needs anything. Every single day. Is that quirky?

OK, I won't tag anyone else because I'm getting sleepy, but for those of you who are just itching to post their six quirks (to confirm what we already know), do so and we'll enjoy reading them!

Yearbook Yourself

This is a fun site.

http://www.yearbookyourself.com/

And here are some of my results:

http://www.new.facebook.com/album.php?aid=31182&l=6f078&id=501269310

Try it out! If you make some, and you're on Facebook, post your pics into a new album and post your public link in the comments.

Not for internal consumption

As I was getting ready for work this morning, I was playing my very first "rip & burn" CD that I made for Veda years ago. With a great amount of cheesiness, I named it "Veda's Love Mix" ... as it contains some of her favorite songs from the ages (as well as some of mine.) An eclectic mix of Karen Carpenter, Journey, Grease soundtrack selections (shut up), Steven Curtis Chapman, Paula Abdul, Whitney Houston, etc.

So as I finish wailing "Faithfully" with Sir Perry, I'm filled with nostalgia. It's as if I'm back in the '80s getting ready for school. And that's when it happened ... something I haven't done for years. I found myself reaching for the bottle. Dark green, gold cap, the man and his horse.

Yes, friends ... I was splashing on some Polo. No, young people. Not Polo Sport. Not Polo Blue, Silver, Black, Double Black, or any other color. I'm talking about the original. Classified as "woodsy." Leather, wood, tobacco, basil and oakmoss ... a masculine scent. Oakmoss? Heck, yeah, oakmoss. What's more masculine than that?

For many of us, Polo was the "wear-it-with-your-Izod" selection ... that cologne that meant you had finally matured beyond Jovan Musk. (Dear God ... I hope I didn't take out an entire herd of Asian musk deer to keep me smelling so spiffy.)

And boy, was the scent of Polo enough to really throw me into a time warp. My mom called me her "Polo guy" and I can remember being bowled over because our band director probably went through a bottle each week. No soap ... just Polo. You could see the distortion of the air around him as he approached, much like the heat waves in Arizona. And then it hit you. POW. Then you were disoriented for the next few minutes. Heaven help you if you had a meeting in his office.

Anyhoo ... I went about my morning routine, smelling like I just came from Crisp County High. I dropped off the kids at school, and made my way to Chik-fil-A for some free Chik-n-minis (with coupon).

About two miles down the road, I made the mistake. I licked my fingers.

Polo does not belong in the mouth. Maybe it's the oakmoss.

Have you ever gotten cologne or perfume in your mouth (by any number of means which we will not discuss here) and it literally sticks to your tongue for a minute or two? Some of the best fragrances do not taste like they smell. Polo is one that is not meant for consumption. Even a swig of diet lemonade couldn't wash it off. But I guess my breath was pretty snappy.

So ... that being said ... what was your personal aromatherapy of choice in high school? Anyone out there willing to admit Brut? (By Faberge, of course.) Old Spice? Charlie (kinda hip, kinda now)?

Now What?

Well, I did it. 15 pounds are gone. It's official.

I went from 185 to 170 since our anniversary on July 18th. 170 was an arbitrary goal. Now I will need to pick a new goal (beyond just keeping off those 15 pounds.)

Of course, I think I hollered off a pound or two at Six Flags last night. I love roller coasters. One of those few moments when it's totally appropriate to yell like a wildman.

I love my kids and their daring sense of adventure. They will do things that I never even dreamed of trying when I was a kid. You'd know what I mean when I say I cried in line for the Dalonega Mine Train when I was a kid. I think I was older than 10. Of course, I loved it.

I talked Amy and Chaz into riding the Wheelie with me. Total fun. Squeals. Shrieks. (And they enjoyed it, too.) That was after two rounds on Splashwater Falls and one round on Thunder River. I took one for the family last night and spared Veda the H2O. The cell phone in the ziplock bag was genius.

Veda and I are going to have a celebratory lunch for taking off the weight and being more healthy. How ironic! I think there is a Cheddar Bay Biscuit in my near future. And a shrimp that met with an untimely death ... let's guess it was a surprise to the little guy. And his friends.